Runners Club

I’m not sure if it is due to a maturation that occurs but with my dissatisfaction with my general appearance and lifestyle when it comes to health I did not choose an eating disorder or cutting but instead chose a completely acceptable way to torture myself. I joined a runners club!

I was told this is fine for any level . It is fun and you will make friends! Perfect! I have runner friends . They are lean and toned and always smiling! They get a runners high. They seem to love whey shakes and veggie juices so I assume you acquire a taste for that disgusting stuff if you run. I mean it’s the extra endorphins right? Happy to swallow anything! Boy my husband will be so happy! I mean there was just no downside. I would attend and overtime like magic I would run! I would be a “runner”. I was in the army for a 6×2 reserve stint and my Chief ran with me to pass my PT test while my good friend Ore came back to sing and pace me after she finished. They just must not have known the magic of a runners club but 14 yrs. later it would happen I could feel it!

The idea itself was so inspiring !

After my first marathon I will immediately write Ft. Jackson and tell them about the runner’s club secret but first I will have to learn them !

You see in Basic Training and AIT the colonel would even come out and run with me. I have never been able to just get out and run. This runner’s club would be the magic trick.

 As soon as I arrived home that afternoon I threw on my sweat bands for my waist , arms and thighs, I put on my long pants, tank top with built in bra, and a sweater. In having such a good time and making new friends I might be able to sweat off a few pounds! Upon arrival one of my good friends with the big smile and high endorphin level from running was over the top elated to see me and her extra happy friend also greeted me with excitement! This runners club was already 100 times better than all these other work out classes.

There was an introduction in a room with the coaches and they engaged everyone divided people by levels and ordered us all shirts to wear together in the 5k will all enter. I went with my beginners group and luckily I knew a man in there. He was a friend’s father. Great I could become a runner with someone I already knew. We went to our beginning point and started.

I live in Texas and  within one minute I was drenched in sweat under my 5 layers of clothes. My beginners group was already in what I considered a full run and they describe as a jog. WTH ? My friend’s dad made it better by maintaining dialogue . He engaged me about his 5000 crunches a day and his age and injuries. I was not feeling a runners high! I was too winded to respond. I didn’t feel happy I felt angry! What trickery ! These people weren’t becoming runners at any level they were already runners! They wanted to run!  I was misled ! I wasn’t producing endorphins. Instead I was getting fat kid pains in my side. Just like the fat kids in gym class when you were in elementary school. You know the ones that started walking the track with their hands over their heads. As I listened and struggled through the 22 minute 1 mile I realized an man 2x my age doing 5000 crunches a day was kindly  slacking on his run to keep me company! one of the coaches even circled back to check on us because we had fallen out of eye sight. As we got closer to our original starting point it became increasingly obvious that this 22 year old coach was struggling to maintain my pace. The pace can only be described as an  I am about to die pace. Seriously, the young lady  couldn’t even keep her runners high smile on her face.

My friend’s father begins saying  ” man I feel great! My circulation is going ! I feel warmed up. My chest feels open I am breathing better!” When he pauses to ask “Isn’t this great?” I had to inform him that I was quite the opposite, My legs were tight and cramping. I was struggling for air and there was so much sweat pouring off me I felt gross. I also could not stop apologizing to my coach about her having to stay at my tortoise pace. To which she never replied! I had sucked happy right out of these runners and I was not getting my high!

When we reached the tent where we started I was greeted with high fives , oranges and cold water! People knew my name. They brought whey protein shake samples out and I thought they were delicious. Maybe there was hope! I still hate running. I am still not excited. My general demeanor has not changed and I ado not smile more. This said I am going to keep going back. They feed me here!


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